A good night’s sleep

We all have different relationships with sleep and rest. Some of us are early birds and

get up with the sun, others prefer to sleep in and get their work done at night. Some of

us can fall asleep at the drop of a hat, while others take hours to fall asleep and only

under very specific conditions. But no matter our sleep habits, one thing remains true for

everyone—good quality sleep is essential for our mental health and well-being.

Interestingly enough, sleep is one of the only factors that’s implicated in every mental

health condition. Study after study demonstrates that lack of sleep is a vulnerability

factor for mental and emotional distress. Just think about how much easier it is to snap

at a loved one on a poor night’s rest. In fact, brain scans have found that lack of proper

sleep causes the emotional processing parts of our brain to become more activated.

The good news? Once we understand this, we can take proactive steps to protect our

well-being by prioritizing sleep. Plus, we have evidence-based treatments that offer

practical strategies for improving sleep quality. The following information is adapted

from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (CBT-I), the gold standard for

addressing sleep difficulties.

A good night’s sleep is a function of four things:

1. Having adequate sleep drive at bedtime

Adequate sleep drive is one of the factors that allows us to fall asleep soon after our

head hits the pillow, rather than stare at the ceiling for hours. Sleep drive naturally

builds up the longer we are awake throughout the day, so that come nighttime we’re

prepared to fall asleep. One thing that can really get in the way of our sleep drive is

daytime napping. If it’s hard to take out napping completely, try to keep it to no more

than 20 minutes a day. Similarly, sleeping in can also diminish your sleep drive (and

yes, this includes shabbos too!). This brings us to the next point…

2. Following a consistent sleep/wake schedule

One of the most important things you can do for your sleep is to develop and follow a

consistent sleep schedule, even on weekends. This means having a set time that you

go to bed and wake up. This helps to keep your body “in sync” with the morning daylight

and activity. If your sleep was disturbed the night before it’s tempting to fall into the trap

of going to bed much earlier the next day or sleeping in, but be mindful of how this can

throw you off schedule and make it harder down the road.

3. Having low levels of physical arousal when sleep is attempted

Attempting sleep becomes easier when there’s a low level of physical arousal. To

promote more calmness, consider sleep hygiene practices. For example, establish a

relaxing bedtime routine, avoid caffeine, get enough exercise and sunlight during the

day, keep your room dark, quiet, and cool, and wear a sleeping mask. Additionally, you

want to make sure that your brain associates your bed and bedroom with sleep, so

consider taking all non-sleeping activities like reading, working, and talking on the

phone to a different room. Also, the longer we stay awake in bed not sleeping, the more

our brain connects our bed with not sleeping, the harder it is to fall asleep the next day.

That’s why if you can’t fall asleep within 20-30 minutes of trying, get up, go to another

room, and do gentle activities like washing dishes, reading a non-stimulating book, or

listening to music. Once you’re feeling sleepy again you can reattempt sleep.

4. Having low levels of mental arousal when sleep is attempted

If you speak to people who struggle with their sleep, one thing you will hear over and

over again is that worrying about not sleeping actually makes it more difficult to sleep,

which leads to a vicious cycle. One way to manage this is by developing a new,

healthier approach to sleep and sleep related thoughts. For example, rather than telling

yourself “I need to sleep tonight” you can tell yourself “I would prefer to sleep well, but

just resting is beneficial too, and staying awake is not a catastrophe.” If other kinds of

worries infiltrate your mind, what we call “middle-of-the night” worries, write them down

and set them aside to take care of the next day. Mantras can also be helpful here too,

for example, “Everything is as it should be now. There is no need for me to lie awake

thinking. I can simply go to sleep.”

Some of these strategies may be challenging to implement and take consistent practice,

but if you’re not getting enough sleep, they’re definitely worth a try! Wishing you the best

of luck, and sweet dreams!